Uhm. Yeeeeah.

Today I went to Cub to get a few grocees. I paid and was packing my stuff. BTW, i got free eggs, english muffs, hash browns and frozen waffles. All. for. FREE!

Score!
Anyhoo, like i said, i was packing my grocees (I hate bagging, don't you?)and the conveyor belt starts moving. You know how it does that? This happens while i'm trying to get the plastic bag open -- which takes me about five minutes per bag because the sides stick together and my fine motor skills suck -- the cashier rings up the next person's grocees and for some reason that starts the conveyor belt. You KNOW how it does that. It is your signal to haul ass.

So my stuff is coming at me like the ducks at the carnival shooting gallery and I am like, wtf ! And my red, white and pink m&m cookies start making their way toward me and the kitty litter and diet mountain dew are right on their tail and then the cookies get held up next to the OJ and the kitty litter and diet mountain dew start marching right over the cookie container and there is this terrible screeching and crunching sound (the plastic cookie container). And this young chick bagging opposite from me looks at me and I look at her . I'm thinking she is somehow making the conveyor belt go and I'm getting pissed.

And the cashier and the goon behind me in line and the chicka bagging across from me and I are all staring, just watching the cookies crumble, so to speak. Time stood still.

Yeah, well, you guessed it. I was unknowingly leaning on the button that makes the conveyor belt progress and it was humiliating because the chicka and the goon and the cashier were all looking at me and they were embarrassed for me because i'm such a goob and i'm old and i cannot even figure out grocery converyor belt technology.

But, good news, the cookies were fine and I recommenced packing and went out into the rain to unload my grocees into the trunk.

When I got home and we were unpacking the grocees, R thought it was quite odd to find a cookie remnant in the bottom of one of the grocee bags, but I just shrugged and popped it in my pie hole.